Starting Over, Celiac Style
At least, that's what I'm telling myself as I type this post with a heat pack tied to my cheek to treat the infection that invaded the space where one of my wisdom teeth used to be.
|Nothing like pantyhose and heatpack to|
make a girl feel attractive!
|Was all this for nothing? (Source)|
I'm tired of gaining weight only to lose it during weeks of stress or sickness.
I'm tired of attaining the mystical healthy gut until a glutening stomps on my intestines.
This tiredness has never seemed more clear than this summer when I've had the time to realize the weaknesses of my post-celiac body. One summer ago, two summers ago, I was at my physical peak of fitness. My mom jokingly called me the "muscular Barbie" as I transformed from a natural stick to a sleek, strong young woman. I reached my highest weight, but also my highest confidence because I knew the strength this body - I - contained.
|Me, two summers ago|
What I'm even more tired of, though? Negativity haunting my life. This morning, the first morning after my infection was removed, I moped around the house like a depressed druggie. I cried over the Instagram photos of foods that I couldn't eat. I growled at my mom, who I will honestly describe as the most loving and positive person I've ever met. I acted like the world as I knew it was ending.
|This was me…without the smile|
And, as I devoured a chocolate sweet potato smoothie and dove into my latest book, the truth of that statement finally hit me. My doctor took me off antibiotics and on a medicinal mouthwash, saving my mouth and my tummy. Even with one bad tooth, three healed without a hitch. And while I won't win a bodybuilding contest anytime soon, my sneakers and swimsuit aren't dusty just yet!
|I found the "sweet" in "bittersweet!"|
And, as I dream of post-healing plates of food and post-summer strength, I, for once, don't mind.
*Also found at Runningwithspoon's link party!*
What do you think of new beginnings? Was celiac a new beginning for you? Comment below!